Is Anyone Else Bothered......

by the commercial from some lunchmeat company (I think it might be Boar's Head, but it's dumb enough to be Hormel, the people that brought us SPAM!) in which a woman is putting perfectly round slices of pre-packaged ham onto some bread and is being grilled by an alleged "food professional" about said pre-packaged ham? What bothers me is the woman's assertion that the ham is "all natural", especially when the alleged food professional inquires about preservatives in the ham. To which she replies "no preservatives". NOW WAIT A COTTON-PICKIN' MINUTE!!!!! It's HAM, for chrissakes'! Ham has SALT, which is a preservative in addition to being a flavor-additive. Ham without salt, whether it is cured by brining, smoking or air-circulation, is at a certain point in its career ROTTEN PORK. It is one thing to claim that you do not use artificial, man-made laboratory concocted chemical preservatives. It is another to try to make me believe that ham occurs in nature absent the application of copious amounts of salt, however derived.

And I've seen hogs and little piggies. The parts that make ham are not, I repeat NOT, perfectly cylindrical and boneless, so don't try to tell me it is "natural" ham. Nature never made a pig that was boneless with perfectly round little back legs. Stop treating me like I'm that damn dumb. Stop treating us all like we are that damn dumb. And to those who are buying into the notion of "natural" ham, then I suggest that I, like the famed chef Jean Anthelme Brillat-Savarin, can tell you what you are by what you eat. You are a goddamn moron.

There's my little rant for the day. God, I love being on vacation!!!!